It "WAS" a Wonderful Life!!

Tonight I had the pleasure of watching the Frank Capra classic, It's a Wonderful Life, on the big screen at Corner Theatre. While watching the movie, I was struck with the thought of a wonderful life that was lost this year, my mother. I thought of all the lives she touched over the years and how much she made a difference in this world. Of course, without her, there would be no me and my children would have never been born. I think of all the people she met and influenced through her work with the public and all the children she gave her time and talent to through the years. All the times she picked up little girls for cheerleading practice and how she gave time and attention to each one. And how they would come back to her and thank her for everything she had done for them. One of those young girls found herself expecting a child while she was just a teen. She came to tell my mother of her situation, because she was worried what my mother would think of her. But, my mother just held out her arms and gave her a big hug and told her that she loved her and gave her support and encouragement. I think of another little girl, who found herself on the wrong side of the law, later in her life, and how my mother never gave up on her and always gave her the benefit of the doubt. My mother always believed in and tried to help those whom the world turned away. She helped the alcoholic, the poor, the sick, the prisoner, and the widow. I can't count the times she gave her own money and food to her neighbors or how she organized to buy Christmas gifts for a needy family. She was once a poor little girl herself, and never forgot how that felt and how others had helped her. And when I think of all the children who were taught religious education by Miss Rose, it brings tears to my eyes. She led so many little souls to Jesus. She was a loving, giving, and devoted daughter, sister, wife, mother, grandmother, and friend. It goes without saying that my mother was always there for me and my children. She never missed a field trip, class party, or activity in which I was involved. And she adored her grandchildren the same way. I've never seen a more loving and giving mother and grandmother. That's why our hearts will always be broken. And while no life is perfect, our gifts and talents do not go unnoticed by God. I know without a doubt that my life and the lives of many others were forever changed for the better by the life of my mother. Rose Marie Allen Taylor, your life was definitely wonderful!! Thank You and Merry Christmas Mother!! I love you!!

Keep on Dancing!!!

A Letter to Myself

Dear Lisa,
I am writing this letter to you from the past, but I want you to know and remember a few things in the future! Always remember your children will still be your children, even when they're grown. They'll still need your love and support for the rest of your life. Just because they're 20, 30 or 40 doesn't mean that they won't need their mama and daddy! God gave them to you and asked you to take care of them and there's no time limit on this responsibility. Sure, you hope they'll grow to be independent, well-adjusted, loving, and giving adults; but that doesn't change the fact, that sometimes...you just need your mother!! One day, life will hit them square in the face. They'll have troubles and hardships, be they physical, emotional, or spiritual. You should be the place they run to, you should be the first person they call!! They'll need a safe place, one where they know they can always return. Don't you always turn to your Heavenly Father?? So too, let your children return to you!! Always have open arms,large ears, and a small mouth!! Remember to give advice lovingly, knowing they may or may not take it. Remember, there'll be a time in life, where they think they don't need you. They'll push you away and refuse to take your advice. Remember, this is part of growing up and becoming independent. They're achieving a developmental milestone. Does this mean that you'll never be needed again? NO!! Will they ever take advantage of you?? YES!! Haven't we all taken advantage of our parents? They'll have to make their own mistakes, but when their world crashes, never say..."I told you so"!! They'll understand your wisdom as they get older. Lisa, I've made you a list of things that are important and you should try to follow them as your children grow into adults.

Always show up to events and functions for your children and grandchildren.
They'll never remember the things you came to, but will always remember the
things you didn't!!

Cook dinner for your children as often as time and location allows!!

When their funds are tight, help them with food, and clothes!!

Be generous with your grandchildren...help buy their clothes, school
supplies & lunches!!

Call your children, even if they don't call you!!

Tell your children you love them, even if they're 50!!

Always be available!!

Talk less and listen more!!

Remember you're still the mama, and they're the child. Always comfort their aches and pains!!

Never let anything separate you from your children!!

p.s. If I think of anything else, I'll let you know!!

Keep On Dancing!!

The Cross Without Christ

On Tues., September 14th, we celebrated a special feast day, The Exaltation of the Holy Cross. In my church, you will find no shortage of crosses. In fact, they are usually crucifixes. A crucifix, is a cross with the body of our Savior, Jesus Christ upon it (Corpus Christi). I'm often asked by non-catholics, "Why do you only use crosses with Jesus on them"?, "Don't you know Jesus isn't on the cross anymore, He rose from the dead"? Yes, we do know he rose from the dead, and it's true that the cross without the Resurrection lacks meaning. But, likewise, there would be no need for the Resurrection without the sacrifice of Jesus Christ! When I see an empty cross, I don't see the whole picture. I want to remember what Jesus did for me!! The crucified Jesus helps me identify with my own sufferings and crosses in life. It reminds me that our God, became flesh and lived, loved, laughed, cried, suffered, and died. Our God has felt the same things we feel! He's not just sitting on a throne, looking down on our sufferings; he has lived them and understands our every pain and groan. Yes, I wear this intrument of torture around my neck and yes, it has the body of my Savior upon it; because for me...the Cross without Christ is nothing!

Keep On Dancing!!!

Follow the Yellow Brick Road

After watching The Wizard of Oz last friday night, I was inspired to write this commentary. Yes, the movie is strange; but as kids we were all drawn to it. That's still true for me and now my own kids. With all the talk of wizards and witches, I guess one could find evil lurking down the Yellow Brick Road. But, I found so many good metaphors there too. Just like Dorothy, we're all searching and yearning to find our way home and for the Christian, our home is with God. I find it amazing that God equips us to make this journey from the time we're born. Just like the "Oz" quartet, we have what we need inside us all along. God gives us a BRAIN and a HEART to know, love, and serve him and others. A BRAIN to know right from wrong...for knowledge, understanding, right judgement, and wisdom. A HEART that we might grow in love for Him and others. A HEART to see God as wonderous and awesome! We have the capacity for kindness, compassion, and empathy. And COURAGE, a gift of the Holy Spirit, to face the challenges of living everyday. COURAGE to stand up for what's right and fight that which is evil. All these virtues are innate and if cultivated by the Holy Spirit lead us to our ultimate destination...into the arms of the one who loves us most, our Heavenly Father. So when in doubt of your path in life, use these beautiful gifts from God to follow your own Yellow Brick Road.

Letter to Mother

As many of my close friends and family know, I experienced the devastating loss of my mother on May 6th, 2010. I decided at that time, to take a break from writing. It wasn't for a lack of material, more like an overwhelming influx of thoughts and emotions. I sort of had to sleep on them, so to speak. I had so much to say and couldn't get all my thoughts organized. I loved writing on my blog though and knew that I wanted to return. I decided several weeks ago that I would make my return to the blogosphere on my mother's birthday. What would I write...how would I start off??? Then, it came to me, I would share the letter I wrote to my mother on the day before she passed. While sitting at her bedside, I composed a letter that I was going to read to her and at her wake service. It was one of the most difficult letters to write emotionally, but the words flowed easily from my heart onto the paper. I wrote the letter on May 5th, 2010 and after writing it, I read it to my mother. She was heavily sedated and breathing with the assistance of a ventilator, but I knew that God had allowed the words to penetrate her heart. I knew she could feel the overwhelming love and gratitude that I had for her. After she passed, I met with our priest, Fr. Vernon to go over the details of her wake and funeral service. I told him that I wanted to read the letter at her wake service. He cut his eyes in my direction and with a slight grin said, "Are you sure you're going to be able to do this?" Was I sure? No, not really, but I said "yes", because I knew I had to do it. Mother and I were more than just mother and daughter, we were like sisters and best friends. She told me everything, and I told her everything. I knew her better than anyone. I wanted the people present to know how much she meant to me and what she had taught me. Before the wake service concluded, I got up to read my letter. I remember being a little weak and I told myself not to even think about the people, just to think about mother and just read the words to her. I said, please God, don't let me get to emotional and be unable to finish and then I began to read...

5-5-10

Dear Mother,

I want to thank you for being the best mother any daughter could ever have. From the day I was born, you loved and protected me, and we have been best friends for almost 44 yrs. You were always there for me when I was little. If I was sick, you nursed me and slept right by my side. You were at every school function and even became involved in all my activities. There were cheerleading practices, football games, dance lessons, and recitals. Remember when I was a teenager and people thought we were sisters. You just loved that and I did too, because we were only 20 yrs. apart.

Mother, you have taught me so much in life. You taught me manners and respect for others. You taught me how to be caring, compassionate, and how to forgive. You taught me how to be a lady, a wife, and a mother. Even if I complained, I always listened to your advice.

You never held a grudge, and I was a pouter. You were smart, outgoing and outspoken. You had a great personality and you never met a stranger. You always believed in telling the truth. Sometimes, I or others didn’t want to hear it, but you were mostly right in what you had to say, and only said it to help, never to be mean. You never kept secrets, sometimes I wished you would have, but really I know why-you were so honest. I get my honesty from you. You loved telling your life story and sometimes we would just say…mother’s telling her life story again!!

You had so many talents, and I hope I have inherited a few of them. You were creative; and I got that one. You were a great talker; I got that one too, but you were better. You were a great dancer, but I think I’m better at that!! You were compassionate and caring to others, especially those that society looks down on. We would laugh, because we both had a knack for attracting “unusual” people, but we both liked it that way. Maybe God sent them to us, because he knew we wouldn’t judge them. You were a kind and giving daughter, sister, wife, mother, grandmother, and friend. I hope to be half as good as you. Sometimes, you were so kind to strangers that it left you open to being taken advantage of. I would fuss at you for letting others “use” you, but you would always say, they would have to answer for that. You could never be outdone in giving!!

Many times when I was younger and several times over the last few years, you have literally given Raleigh and I your last dollar. You were so unselfish!!

I don’t want to make you out to be perfect, but you always tried to improve and be a better person.

One thing I’ve always admired about you was your ability to overcome any obstacle and challenge. You fought so many battles in your life. You were born premature in 1946. Your mom was told you might not live, but you were a fighter. You suffered the divorce of your parents and poverty as a child. At five, you contracted polio. Your mother was told you might never walk again, but you proved the doctors wrong. You pedaled that little red fire engine through the pain and kept going. You survived abuse at the hands of a relative. You endured the separation from your sister at a very young age, and a step-father that denied you necessities and time with your mother. And you survived the heartbreak of divorce as an adult. You have suffered so much with your health in the past ten years, and it has been so tough to see your pain. But, you never let it stop you, you kept going. You always wanted to be there for me, Raleigh and the kids. I hope my family and I have brought you joy and love, because you deserve it!!

I always enjoyed our time together. I remember when I would sit in your lap and you would read me stories and teach me nursery rhymes. All the Christmases that you showered me with too many presents, because I was the only child and you spoiled me. I remember all the times you defended me when you thought I had been wronged by others. I remember all of our fun shopping trips to Parisian and how you couldn’t resist buying me the best of everything, even if it meant you did without. We had some great mother/daughter times. And, I’ll never forget our long talks and phone calls. That’s what I miss most right now.

You were an awesome grandmother too. You have been so loving and giving to my children. You always said that you were going to give to them while you were alive, because when you were gone, it would be too late. You have given them so much and I’m sure they will never forget.

One of my favorite verses is John 13:34-35. It says,

34"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

Mother, I think you are known as a disciple in Heaven right now, because you have shown love to others.

Thank you for teaching me how to be a wife, mother, and friend. You are my role model and inspiration. For a simple, ordinary person who lived a simple life, you have made an extraordinary impact. You have touched the lives of so many people and I hope I can live up to that.

I know your flaws, shortcomings, and sins, because you never tried to hide them from me. And I know they are covered by the blood of Jesus and have been forgiven. You should have no regrets and right now, I know you’re enjoying your eternal reward- a life free of pain and suffering in the presence of God. I know you have been welcomed into the Father’s Kingdom!!


I love you mother and always will,
Your daughter,
Lisa Michelle Taylor Dougherty




NOTE: I read this letter to my mother and those present at her visitation and wake on Mon. May 10, 2010. I wrote the letter on Wed. May 5, 2010, while I was sitting at her bedside in the ICU. I knew our time was short and that her death could come at anytime. After I wrote the letter, I went up to her side and read the letter to her. She was heavily sedated on the ventilator and unresponsive, but I know God allowed her to her my words. I gave her permission to go, if she needed to go. And told her that I would be ok and Raleigh and my family would take care of me. She passed away the next day, on Thurs. May 6, 2010 at 8:15pm. At that moment, she arrived in her Heavenly home surrounded by Angels and loved ones who were waiting. To her, nothing else existed…only GOD in his glory! Since that day, I have received numerous signs of her care for me and her happiness. I have kept a journal and listed each one of them. I thank my mother and our Heavenly Father for giving this peace to me. And while I grieve her loss more deeply than anything I’ve ever experienced, I know she is happy and at peace. This gift is helping me survive my exile. I know one day we will be reunited and I will truly be home!

Keep on Dancing!!

I'll Be Back!!

New post coming on August 21, 2010!

Keep on Dancing!!

Just a Coincidence?

I guess I really don't believe in coincidences. I believe there is a design to our lives and that design is created by God. This applies to the good and the bad in our lives. Although God doesn't make bad things happen to us, he has given his highest creation (human beings), the gift of being made in his image (we can think, choose, and love); we have a freewill. When this awesome gift is set in motion, it can sometimes create good and sometimes bad. We also live in a fallen creation and bad things are part of our universe. When something good happens in my life, I have no trouble assigning the source of my happiness to God. And when I get a thought to call a friend or help a stranger, I always give credit to the Holy Spirit. But, when something goes wrong, it's harder to find any joy or meaning in that type of suffering. It takes work and maybe even many years to see what good could come from such a thing.

In high school, I often wondered why my teenage crush never gave me one glance. My heart always seemed to be broken. But, as I became an adult and started to date my husband-to-be, everything seemed to fall into place. There are so many times that I can see the workings of God's design in my life. I can see how some of the saddest times in my life have led to good.

On Feb. 17th, as I was preparing for Lent, I suddenly became very ill. I developed a high fever, chills and body aches. I felt as though I had the flu. After 10 days of the usual treatments, I was getting worse. I developed an inflamed liver and jaundice. I underwent ultrasounds, cat scans, and numerous lab tests. The fatigue was very debilitating and I was unable to work or take care of my family. After the doctor's testing, I was found to have Mononucleosis/Epstein-Barr Virus. Prior to getting sick, I had decided to take a fast from my addiction to Facebook. It was all kind of a joke among my family and friends. They were all saying, "You can't do it" and "You'll never make it". I was scared, but I knew I could do it. I had asked God to help me break my habit and to help me grow closer to him during this 6 week fast. Well, I had "0" energy and never even wanted to touch the computer or access Facebook. He made breaking my habit very easy. But, God took my illness and placed me in the desert with his son, Jesus. I was so tired, I couldn't even pray or read his word. But, he gave me silence, peace, and the gift of relying upon him totally. By doing this, he drew me closer to him, and that's exactly what I had asked from him. I often thought of Jesus and his 40 days in the desert. I know he must have felt confused and alone. He was tempted by Satan and must have been at his wits end, but those human emotions allowed him to refocus and accept his ultimate mission-the salvation of the world! I hope we can all learn to take our own personal deserts and learn to refocus and accept our own mission-to love and serve our Lord, Jesus Christ!

p.s. I made it 6 weeks without Facebook and I returned to work after a 4 week recovery. I'm still healing and seeing my doctor for follow-ups!

Keep on Dancing!!

Can I do it?? No Facebook for 6 weeks!!!

Well, here comes the big question!!! Can Lisa give up Facebook for 6 weeks?? The scary thing is, I DON'T KNOW!?! It totally freaks me out that I'm so addicted to something, especially something I told my son less than a year ago, was stupid and that I would never do! But, let me sing the praises of FB (that's what we users call it). I think like any other thing in this world, that if used properly, Facebook is a wonderful thing. Since signing up for FB, I have reconnected with so many old friends, kept in touch with my neighbors, and even talk with people I've never met. I have been shown love, support, and kindness by so many people (and everyone seems to know my birthday, haha). As a communication tool...it rocks!! But, with the good comes the bad...it lacks physical presence and speaking via text doesn't always help some conversations. One cannot discern the tone and expression of others and that makes some people jumpy and defensive. I've had my share of family arguments via Facebook and it's not something of which I'm proud. It does have a touch of voyeurism too...I know what my neighbor is cooking and when one of my son's friends pierced her ears for the 3rd time without her mother's permission! It seems to swallow up whole hours and keep one from getting a good nights sleep. 15 minutes at 11pm, turns into 2 hrs., and before you know it...it's 1am!! I'm definitely not saying I'm giving it up forever!! LOL (that means laugh out loud)!! But, I am thinking that I might could do this for 6 weeks. Of course, I'll miss out on what all my friends are doing and when their next haircut occurs, but I'm going to try and devote a little more time to my family. And give more time to my Lord and Savior, who has given up so much for me. Turns out, after a Google search, I'm not the only person addicted to Facebook that plans to take a break for Lent!! Don't worry about it...I'll be back!! I get much joy out of being there for you, supporting you and praying for you. I feel honored to share in your joys and sorrows. And I thank all of you for being there for me too! God bless you my FB Friends!!

Keep on Dancing!!

Let's "Give it Up" for Lent!!

The season of Lent, which begins with Ash Wednesday on Feb. 17th, is an awesome time to refocus our lives. As Catholic Christians, we take this 6 week period before Easter to peel away the layers, to look inside at what may be keeping us from having a closer relationship with Jesus. We evaluate our sinful nature and try to recommit our lives to Him. It's hard to look inside at the ugliness of sin...to really take responibility for the things we do...or don't do for that matter!! What's keeping me from Jesus and my ultimate goal of spending eternity with Him?? Is it a preoccupation with worldly possessions? Is it to much time on the computer or some other addiction? Is it a hatred for someone or an apathy for my job? To be honest, I often find it's the little things...like being late (for which I'm famous), or not giving time and attention to my spouse, or not giving 100% to the task at hand.

To get refocused and recharged we use certain practices to retrain ourselves. I'm often asked about the practice of fasting and abstaining. During Lent, we fast at certain times and abstain from eating meat on fridays. Most Catholics "give up" something as well. It maybe a certain food, or some habit of which we aren't proud. Some people give up watching TV or they may decide to give up sweets, or a favorite drink. Yes, these are trivial things, but it's not necessarily what your fasting from, but the ability to practice self-denial, obedience, and self-discipline. Our ultimate model, is Jesus himself...who was obedient to the Father and willing to sacrifice his own life for our sins. While practicing this self-denial we can relate in some small way to our Lord. It allows us to open the scripture and be more spiritually focused.

We try to take up habits and practices that are more pleasing to God. We can decide to help a neighbor with a task, or sponsor a young girl who is with child. We can donate clothing or food to the homeless shelter or spend more time with family in prayer and devotion. We're reminded that our lives are like waves which crash upon the sand, our mortal bodies are fleeting...we want to focus on what will last, and that's the soul!! We're preparing for our heavenly home which will be filled with richness, goodness, and abundance beyond compare!

So, let's be committed to "giving up" that which is keeping us from Christ! Let's turn away from sin and be faithful to God's message in the Gospel! Let us be cleansed from our sinful ways and open our hearts to what God is offering us!!

Keep on Dancing!!

Why do we Have to Choose Sides?

As we celebrate the national Martin Luther King Jr. Holiday, I was thinking how far we've come from the 1960's...and how far we have to go as a human race. My question is, why do we have to choose sides? Why do we have to divide ourselves into black and white, rich and poor, this or that?? Why can't we be a part of the human race and why can't we respect each other in spite of our differences? Why do we even have to point out our differences? It seems that many national leaders, political pundits and activists are always pointing out our differences and things that separate us...never the things that unite us! It seems they are so far removed from the true picture, where most of us live and work with many different races and cultures. We seem to be doing ok with each other, but they are constantly telling us we are not. They are constantly pitting us against each other and wanting us to take sides. How fitting that as we celebrate this day, we as Americans are united behind the Haitian people. Disaster and tragedy know no color or station in life. It is simply humans in need of human kindness and I think Dr. King would like that!!

Keep on Dancing!!